Serena Kerrigan

ISerena Kerrigan for real? We’re dying to know. On one hand, the 26-year-old is one of the most brazenly candid voices on the internet right now. But Serena is a video producer by trade, with a show-biz family skilled in the art (and commerce) of reality TV drama.

Her two sides come together in Let’s F*cking Datea breakout hit of IGTV that combines Serena’s fiercely funny candor with a live feed lineup of potential suitors, plus guest appearances from friends like Bachelorette Rachel Lindsay and fashion editor Chrissy Rutherford. At the end of her show’s first season, we asked Serena about her tricks for staying confident, her plans for TV domination, and whether you, too, should f*cking date right now.

You call yourself “the queen of confidence.” Does that mean you feel confident all the time?
Absolutely not. In fact, not feeling confident is part of why I started my show. I did not feel confident about living alone in my apartment by myself. I was really overwhelmed. And then I was ashamed, because my whole mission is to empower women to find validation through themselves, not other people! And suddenly I’m panicked about being alone?! I felt like a fraud.

How did you stop that spiral?
I realized in a time of crisis, there are two types of people: ones who wait for things to get better, and ones who say, “I’m going to help make things better.”

So to you, the show is a form of self-care?
Absolutely. I started it to provide entertainment and escapism while empowering women to go on dates and not take it so seriously. You can be yourself, unapologetically, and not put up with bullshit. The main theme of Let’s F*cking Date is that you are your own perfect match. You’re complete as you are. The guys, I mean… take or leave them!

You often talk about privilege on your show, and you’re always very candid about your own advantages.
You have to be. For me, I was kind of born into TV. One of my parents produces scripted shows; one does reality television. I’ve been surrounded by the industry since I was little.

But do you think being blonde and sexy is also a privilege? And is it easier to talk about “loving yourself” when you’re thin and blonde and rich?
That’s an incredible question.

Thank you for not slamming down the phone.
No! So, listen. I dealt with a lot of insecurity growing up, body image issues, self worth issues, all of it. For a long time, I did think my worth was validated by male attention. But the thing I finally learned is, if a guy isn’t attracted to you, so what? They’re not your person! And in terms of being “hot,” we all wish we could look like someone else. But you’ll never be someone else. And even more important, they’ll never be you. Only you get to be you. And that’s a gift.

What’s an adjustment we can make in our own minds to be more confident?
Treat yourself like a friend. Would you ever say to your friend, “You’re not beautiful?” No. Talk to yourself like you talk to your best friend. There shouldn’t be a double standard—if you’re honest and kind to others, you must be honest and kind to yourself.

Will you ever go on a “normal” first date again?
Never. Why would I waste my time? Just on FaceTime, I know within the first three minutes if we have chemistry. It’s really obvious. Plus, if you’re dating on FaceTime, you can do three or four dates a night!

Ha! That really backfired on Sex and the City…
Yeah, but Carrie Bradshaw didn’t even know how to use a computer. I know it’s cheesy, but I do love that show. When I describe my job, sometimes people say, “Oh, you’re like Carrie!” But obviously, I’m Samantha.