Convos around personal finances are complex, especially during a separation or divorce. That’s why we chatted with Lauren Bringle (she/her), an accredited financial counselor at Self Financial, to find out how you can protect yourself and your $$$ so a stressful situation doesn’t feel as stressful.

Before getting into the financial details of divorce, Lauren wants you to remember this, though: “Make sure you’re giving yourself time and space to heal—both emotionally and financially—and taking advantage of the resources that can help you. Divorce is one of the biggest traumas you can go through, and it affects all aspects of your wellbeing. Prioritizing financial wellness also means prioritizing your mental health on a very practical level.”

Now, let’s get to those deets.

Research shows that women are at more of a disadvantage when it comes to divorce. Why is this?
There is a fundamental difference in how men and women are talked to about money. Women are frequently taught to be frugal and prioritize saving, while men are taught how to invest and grow their assets. Women are often not empowered to manage their finances independently. If you’re going through a divorce, these traditional roles can put women at a disadvantage when dividing assets—especially if they didn’t play an active role in financial decisions and have productive conversations about their finances with their spouse before. This study found that women’s household income fell by an average of 41% following a divorce, while men’s household income fell by only 23%.

After a divorce, whether you’re a caregiver or a breadwinner can impact your ability to bounce back. If you were primarily a stay-at-home caregiver during marriage, some hurdles you may face post-divorce are challenges re-entering the workplace, establishing or growing your income to meet your new financial needs, and making sure you have enough savings to start over on your own. If you’re the primary breadwinner during a divorce, you may be more concerned with protecting your assets and preparing to pay your ex a settlement if required.

So, what are your tips on how women can protect their assets?
I have a few:

1. Make sure your credit is in good shape. Credit is not only a fall back plan in case of emergency, but a tool to help you build your dream life. Having good credit can help you borrow money if you need to, and at better rates than if you have bad credit. If you don’t have enough emergency savings, credit cards or personal loans can bridge the gap. Good credit could also make it easier to access competitive home loans, car loans, or even lower car insurance premiums in the future.

2. Place a freeze on your credit reports to prevent your ex from borrowing money or racking up debt in your name. Unfortunately, many women suffer from identity theft during divorce at the hands of a current or former spouse. Ex: If your past partner has your personal information, it may be easy for them to open credit cards in your name, rack up debt, and leave you with the bill. This can hurt both your credit and your financial outlook.

When you freeze your credit, you prevent anyone (including yourself) from applying for new credit in your name, unless you specifically lift the freeze before you apply. To freeze your credit, visit the websites for each of the 3 major credit bureaus—Experian, Equifax, and TransUnion—and place a freeze either through their online portals or by calling the numbers provided on their websites. The good news is, you can visit those same websites to either permanently or temporarily lift the freeze any time you plan to apply for credit.

3. Have a strong sense of your current financial situation. Before your divorce, take inventory of your finances. This includes gathering documents for any shared or private bank accounts, loans, and debts. This will not only give you a strong understanding of what you may walk away with, but can prepare you for any debts you might be forced to take on. As you review your finances, think about how much you have in savings, and how much money you have set aside to help you transition to living alone. Finally, think about the essentials—what is the bare minimum that can get you through the day with to start? Prioritizing your needs is essential as you maneuver your new financial position.

4. Don’t be afraid to seek advice from financial experts. Managing your finances can be a daunting task, and there is nothing shameful about asking for assistance. Financial coaches at organizations like Operation Hope, NFCC, and AFCPE are available to help you understand the steps you need to take to protect your finances, manage debt, budget, save, and build credit as needed. Many of these services are offered either for free or at a low cost if you meet certain qualifications, too.

What other advice do you have for those going through a separation or divorce?
Another way to protect yourself is to plan ahead and take preventive measures, such as a prenup. While there are some stigmas against them and misconceptions like how they’re only for the wealthy, they actually help you and your partner have critical conversations about financial goals, values, assets, and challenges before getting married. Since disagreements over finances and communication issues are cited as top reasons for divorce, getting on the same page financially could actually help your marriage.