The heartbreak that comes with a breakup can see us facing an incredibly challenging time in life. It can strip us down to our emotional core and coming back from it can feel impossible. At the same time though, going through heartbreak can also provide the perfect catalyst for reinvention. Whether it’s in your relationships, career, travel, creatively, or health and wellbeing, there is so much opportunity to create major positive change in your life as a result of going through heartbreak! Here are some ideas on where to start.
1) Set New Boundaries. A big part of reinvention is getting clear on your boundaries. Boundaries are like that inner alert system that signal to you when your core needs are being compromised. When it comes to relationships especially, boundaries are one of the key components to maintaining your values, self-love and self-knowing. They show you and others that you have ultimate respect for yourself and act on your core needs as opposed to settling for less or turning a blind eye.
2) Take Inventory of your Life. Going through heartbreak changed the entire trajectory of my career and creative life in the best way possible. The lows of heartbreak really show you the importance of fulfilment and getting to the heart of what makes you happy. The void of your ex not being in your life is hard but also creates new, open space to assess what might have been missing that deep down you’ve been craving but ignored. Now is the time to be brave and bold and take the steps to making those things happen. Just focus on one thing at a time though – what’s most important to you right now and start there!
3) Get Creative. So many writers, actors, entrepreneurs and music artists have created their best work or projects as a result of heartbreak! I love social media and we can’t deny it’s a big part of our world, but it can soon become a form of procrastination that leads to comparison, ex stalking and feeling even worse about life. So get offline and do something creative, just for fun. It can be absolutely anything you like – something you haven’t done for years or just trying something new. The only aim is to lose yourself in something for a while. You never know, you might unearth a new hobby!
4) Surround yourself with people who inspire you – and who you can inspire. It can be tempting to wallow alone at home in times of heartbreak and whilst that can be healthy to do for a while, long-term it won’t help. Spending some time around people who you feel good and inspired around, and who you can also inspire in some way, can give you such a boost. These can be existing friends or a great tip is to look at interest groups on places like Meetup.com. Creating new memories is a huge part of reinvention and a good way to start doing that can be widening your social circle and perspectives!
5) Forgive yourself and others. Reinvention and moving on means letting go of the past. Along with that comes self-forgiveness as well as forgiving your ex or events that have caused your heartbreak. It isn’t about condoning bad behaviour or trivialising what’s happened, it’s about giving yourself the choice to learn from the pain but let go of it. Letting go with strength, dignity and a desire to live your very best life that you fully deserve!
Laura Yates is a writer, mentor and content creator who helps people to bounce back after heartbreak. You can find Laura’s website and blog at laurayates.org and follow her on Instagram @lauramyates